Quote de jour
"If God had wanted me otherwise, He would have created me otherwise.
                                                                                             ~Johann von Goethe

Oprah's tag line is "be your best self", but what does that really mean? Every self-help guru promotes self-improvement, striving for lofty goals and pie-in-the-sky Nirvana. I'd rather focus on being your self. That means acceptance of all your selves, good, bad, best or indifferent. Most people spend so much time and energy not being themselves, molding themselves in some false ideal when actually we are at our core, perfectly fine. How do we know when we're not being our true self?

• Wearing a mask is exhausting. Sooner or later bits of skin get torn off with the mask.
• Our energy and our moods sag.
• We feel empty, ungrounded or unfulfilled
• We feel powerless or have less power.          

How can we learn to just be?

•  It takes courage but we all have courage. Think about a time when you faced your fears. Didn't you feel empowered afterward?
• Keep reminders or touchstones of your courage, power, beauty and uniqueness with photos,objects, art, stones, books etc.
• Speak your truth. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Everyone has experienced loss in some form: work, money, love, identity.
• Spend time alone with yourself, especially in nature.
• Notice what you notice. The bird flying, the soft pine needles under your feet, the million shades of green, the sun on your face.
• Stop trying to impress or worry what people think. Most people are so fixated on their own worries, they don't notice.
• Cultivate your inner-guru. Even the most famous and successful icons, teachers and gurus don't always have the answers. They're human too.
• Slow down. Breathe in and feel your feelings. All of them. It's all good. Really.
• Don't be afraid to ASK for help from a higher source by prayer or meditation.

• I took these self-portraits the other day when I was experiencing a deep sense of loss and needed some answers. Each photo reveals a part of me. The wise woman, the wounded, the curious and the warrior.
  Sometimes, I seek answers externally from friends or professionals whose guidance I trust, but the best guide is ultimately yourself. A walk in the woods or the nearby labyrinth usually does the trick for me. This time it wasn't enough and I prayed for guidance while slowly walking, focused on my breath and allowing everything I notice to propel me forward on this journey: tall trees, pine cones, broken acorns, squirrel chatter, light reflected through the grass, a rabbit darting into a bush, half-dead sunflowers hanging their heads, a path I'd never noticed before, a large boulder calling my name. I sat down and felt the cool, hard stone numb my bum. I fidgeted and tried to center myself. "You are not your body. You are beyond physical form." Yeah, right.  I laughed after shedding some tears. An old guru in India used to say just that until a bee stung him on the nose. When I accepted the discomfort of the hard surface and the squirrelly tumult in my head, I dissolved into my breath. I don't know how long I sat there, but the inner guide who brought me to the boulder, nudged me to get up. I slowly untangled my limbs and wended my way home, with the answer I needed.